Swine Fever by Andrew Cartmel

Author:Andrew Cartmel [Cartmel, Andrew]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Science Fiction
Publisher: Rebellion Publishing Limited
Published: 2009-10-05T13:00:00+00:00

The Cetacean Ambassador splashed from one end of the swimming pool to the other half a dozen times in quick succession before rearing up with his cheerfully smiling bottle-nosed face above the surface and crashing down, splashing the humans who were all standing beside the pool watching the show.

Leo looked furiously at the water dripping off him. "Try that again, Flipper, and we're going to turn you into sushi..."

"He can't hear you," said Theo.

"In point of fact, he can," said the robot. "Not only can he hear you, he can understand you and also reply." Even to Blue Streak, the robot seemed to possess a pain-in-the-ass, know-it-all tone.

Theo turned on the robot and said, "But his translation device is attached to his..."

"Tank thingy," supplied Blue Belle.

Theo nodded. "That's right. And he isn't in the tank thingy any more."

The robot managed to sound almost smug as it replied. "The cetacean has a translation receiver and transmitter surgically implanted in his body."

"In other words," said a voice from behind them, "I can hear you and you can hear me." Streak and the others spun around, startled.

"It's coming from the empty tank," said Streak.

"Or rather, from the control panel at its base," said Mac.

"The tank isn't empty," said Belle pedantically. "It's full of water. And dolphin shit."

"And I am over here," said the voice from the speaker at the base of the tank. They all turned to stare again at the smiling dolphin that was looking at them from the swimming pool. "You might say I am throwing my voice."

"The cetacean is making a pun about ventriloquism," said the robot.

"Shut your metal face," said Theo. "And somebody explain to me why we've got this dolphin here."

"Touching on that matter," said the cetacean, via his remote speaker, "could you kindly explain the circumstances of my abduction? I am somewhat confused. I was expecting to be at an embassy reception right about now, eating considerable quantities of snow crab."

"The circumstances?" said Theo. "I killed your chauffeur and hijacked your limo and brought you here."

"But why?"

"It's quite simple, boys," said Mac. He glanced at Belle and made a little bow. "And girl." Streak could have killed him right then. "We're all in the meat business. And our friend splashing in the pool here has come to the Mega-City on a mission of vital importance to that business."

"You don't mean the dolphins are going to muscle in on our trade?" said Streak.

"On the contrary," said the voice from the empty tank. "My people would never sully their fins or snouts with that bloody, filthy criminal commerce."

"Ha! That shows how much you know," said Leo. "It's not criminal any more. The mutant pig business is entirely legit now. The Council of Five says so. The Judges even have to protect pork vendors instead of closing them down."

"That may be so," said Mac gravely. "But boys - and girl - that may all be about to change."

"What do you mean, change?" asked Belle.

"I mean no sooner have we become

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